Nurturing Relationship during pandemic

Nurturing Relationship During Pandemic

The ongoing COVID-19 pandemic has put a halt in our daily lives and confined us within four walls. During this time, relationships can offer us a huge support and help us function effectively, especially this time of fear and uncertainty. 

Currently, when the entire mankind is facing their biggest crisis, the need for human connection and relationship increases. According to the studies conducted on behaviour, it was observed that in mammals, touch is crucial as it is an important aspect of affiliative behaviours and through that we satisfy our need for connection and bonding.

One of the major changes that occurred as a result of the pandemic is that none of events were under our control and as humans, we crave control and security. We are forced to give up our daily routines and confine ourselves within four walls. This can invariably affect our relationships. Couple related issues/conflicts are likely to increase in this Self-Quarantine period. China's quarantine period has led to similar kind of a situation. But this pandemic also provides as an opportunity and time to nurture these relationships. Crisis has its both advantages and disadvantages

Various mental health professionals participated in the online discussion forum on the topic, “Nurturing Relationship During Pandemic” hosted by Mind zone, Chennai.

There is a need to nurture our relationships into being positive and open, so that it can act as a source of comfort and support. And this can be accomplished in certain ways which were discussed.

1. At times like this, being fearful and frustrated is normal. Pandemic situation creates aggressiveness among individuals as routine gets disturbed. Humans avoid change because it takes time and during the process, it can lead to fear, frustration and anger. The first step in combating this, would be to accept the changes. Accept that there was a change and that we will undergo such changes. Trying to deny and avoid those changes can worsen the situation.

2. Once we have accepted these changes, we need to work towards creating safe space and create a routine. Humans need structure and a semblance of normality to function. 

3. For any relationship to work, there needs to be an open and honest communication that leads to positive changes. People should find ways to express themselves to their partners without developing conflicts and fights.

4. One of the key techniques to nurture positive relationships is to be empathetic. Understand that although two people are in a relationship, they are foremost an individual who have their own differences and ways of living. By being empathetic, you can learn to respect and accept the partner. You will also be able to accommodate those differences instead of compromising your self-identity.

5. A simple four step process to nurture a positive relationship is to follow STAR- support, trust, accept and respect.

6. One of the ways to deal with the pandemic as well as to nurture relationship is to develop positive attitude and adaptive coping skills that emphasis on the positive aspects of life. It is better to avoid dwelling on issues or unresolved problems at this particular time.

7. Developing a positive approach to face the situation. Ex: adopting a spiritual or philosophical kind of an approach.

8. Relationships can be nurtured when both the partners are involved in the process. it is always beneficial when both the people take part in the process and have a common goal. Developing concern for others is essential in this quarantine period.

9. One of the best ways of nurturing relationships is by expressing gratitude and appreciation towards each other. This can be done by writing letters or letting the other person know what you like about them. This will also ensure that the other person feels recognised for their efforts. Creating a habit of this would lead to positive long-term effects in the relationship.

10. Along with expressing appreciation, you can also let go of past regrets and resentment as this can lead to distancing and act as an obstacle in nurturing a positive relationship. Forgiving others and letting the situation to pass on its own, in a way is considered essential.

11. It would be beneficial if all the family members take part in doing chores and sharing responsibilities.

12. In the time of crisis, wrong information or distorted ideas can lead to fear and feelings of insecurity. This can invariably lead to increased levels of fear and anger.  Have the right information, learn to identify credible source and gain useful knowledge. You will be able to create a safe space and state of mind for both your partner and yourself. Be more open and aware of the changes that happened to yourself, your partner and the outside world. in this way, you will also be able prepare yourself.

13. A sense of humour and fun will go a long way in dissipating tension and bring the members closer. Set aside time to play games, utilise this time to make plans for future or a holiday.

14. As much as it is important to be with family and help them, it is also important that you focus on yourself. A little bit of self-love can help in nurturing positive relationships and you can achieve that by overcoming your fears and doubts and reassure yourself.

15. Developing knowledge about self and relationship by asking oneself: how can we manage one's own self and add values to other's life and how can we help friends and families?

In a nutshell, nurturing relationship involves managing self and relationship in a manner that is effective and adds value to the other’s life.

Prepared by 

Ms. Rajini

Undergraduate Psychology Student

CHRIST UNIVERSITY

MS. Abirami

M.sc (Psychology)

PONDICHERRY UNIVERSITY